Adventures of the Caffeine Kid

Iris has been hanging out in coffeehouses since she was a week old, when I started taking her to Espresso Vivace. At six pounds, she was too small for even a Baby Bjorn, so I would carry her in one of those precarious-looking baby slings, the kind that make otherwise normal people ask, “Is there a real *baby* in there?” Having a baby in tow is a great way to become a regular; you’re no longer some guy, you’re The Guy With the Baby.

Vivace provides a nice kids’ play area in the back, but Iris has never been that interested in it, because going to a coffeehouse is entertainment in itself. There are weird hissing sounds and coffee smells and a mix of people. Vivace makes among Seattle’s best espresso drinks, so people flock to it from all over town–people in suits, people with a hundred piercings, and every kind of person in between, including plenty of people who, like me, get all their work done in coffeehouses. Quickly I was established as a decaf macchiato guy.

Soon Iris was old enough to taste a dot of macchiato foam. Then I would hand her the espresso spoon, and this was the most exciting thing she’d ever held, even though she was completely unable to spoon anything up with it. We stole several Vivace spoons, so I guess I introduced her to drugs and crime in the same place.

Finally, she was ready to have her own madeleine, which is the perfect cookie for a baby, because it’s so soft and crumbly. Recently Iris was reading the Martha Stewart Holiday Cookies magazine and came across a full-page photo of a madeleine. “Madeleine! Iris eat one sometimes at Joe Bar,” she said. Joe Bar is another of our favorite coffeehouses, and they have crepes. We usually get a lemon crepe with whipped cream. “Sweet and creamy,” says Iris, and this is pretty much her highest compliment.

The New York Times recently had an article about kids gone wild in coffeehouses. There are few enough kids in our neighborhood that I’ve never noticed a problem at any of the coffeehouses we frequent, so I don’t really have an opinion on this vitally important issue. Once, though, we took Iris to a coffeehouse designed with kids in mind: My Coffee House, on Madison. My Coffee House has more toys than the average Toys “R” Us location. Apparently all the kids had been drinking triple lattes all morning, because even the newborns were on a rampage. We haven’t been back to My Coffee House.

Some other Capitol Hill coffeehouses that Iris and I recommend are Red Line (at Denny and Olive), Victrola (on 15th, where I’m typing *right now*), the big Starbucks (which Iris calls Coffeebucks) on Olive, and Cafe Dharwin (10th and Miller). Iris is particularly fond of Cafe Dharwin; it’s near her friend Charlie’s house, and I would drop her off to play with Charlie and his babysitter and then go work at Cafe Dharwin. When I left, Iris would say, “Dada go to Cafe Dharwin, typing on the baby computer.” One morning we were running late, so I asked Iris if she’d like to have breakfast at Cafe Dharwin. Would she ever. We had a lemon poppyseed muffin. “Did that baby just say ‘Cafe Dharwin’?” asked the barista.

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