When Iris started school, I figured she’d get colds all the time. It didn’t occur to me that she’d bring them home and give them to me. It took a whole week and a half for this to happen. By the time Iris graduates from high school, I am going to look like a patient on House. Maybe I could get her to wear a face mask to school and tote a box of latex gloves. That would be totally cool, right?

While moping around, I noticed something mildly interesting. When I have a cold, I lose the ability to tell whether I’m hungry. This morning I only knew it was time for breakfast because I heard my stomach growling. But it’s not that I lose my appetite, either. I had a bulgogi sandwich for lunch. When I finished, I felt no more or less full than before. I don’t know whether this has to do with my sense of smell being impaired or what. If anyone wants to turn it into a satiety research project, just give me a byline on the paper and 10 percent of the grant and we’re cool.