**Me:** Iris, do you want some greens with dinner?
**Iris:** What kind of greens are they?
**Me:** Kale.
**Iris:** Bleah, I only like bok choy.
**Laurie:** Dada’s making homemade dumplings tomorrow.
**Iris** (_picking up the remote_): Let’s skip to tomorrow’s dinner.
Iris and I took a trip to Uwajimaya today. We bought a raisin-coconut bun from Yummy House Bakery and a bullet train coloring book from Kinokuniya. I told Iris she could pick out a box of Pocky sticks as usual, but instead her eyes alighted upon Calpico Capu Capu, which are cookies shaped like ice cream cones. I thought they’d be terrible, but actually they’re pretty great. The box contains an assortment of chocolate, strawberry, and vanilla, and the “ice cream” is like the inside of an Aero bar. It actually is a lot like eating an ice cream bar. Recommended.
On the way out I asked Iris if she wanted to feed the dragon some ice cream cookies. “The dragon ONLY likes Pockys,” she replied, making her angry face.
As you may know, I write a monthly taste-test column for Seattle Magazine. For a long time it wasn’t available online, but now they’re posting some of them on the magazine’s web site. For example:
* [Ethan Stowell on Olive Oil](http://seattlemag.com/ME2/Audiences/dirmod.asp?sid=&nm=&type=Publishing&mod=Publications%3A%3AArticle&mid=3E1DA341B2834604B64A1EB3BA74CCFB&tier=4&id=21AC832EFED74B3DA8AAB450F804F2F2&AudID=42BFF54AF0444B8F92E1C3E1A324650E)
* [Joseba Jiménez de Jiménez on Sherry Vinegar](http://seattlemag.com/ME2/Audiences/dirmod.asp?sid=&nm=&type=Publishing&mod=Publications%3A%3AArticle&mid=3E1DA341B2834604B64A1EB3BA74CCFB&tier=4&id=C34FF58152D1471DB91624E4A55AA226&AudID=42BFF54AF0444B8F92E1C3E1A324650E)
* [Tamara Murphy on Bacon](http://www.seattlemag.com/ME2/Audiences/dirmod.asp?sid=&nm=&type=Publishing&mod=Publications%3A%3AArticle&mid=3E1DA341B2834604B64A1EB3BA74CCFB&tier=4&id=D4392AE0CACB44F482930394D4EFD3E0&AudID=42BFF54AF0444B8F92E1C3E1A324650E)
You get the idea. Iris has long wanted to come along to a Chef Test, but the timing hasn’t worked out. She suggested the Iris Test after this incident involving canned tomatoes:
> **Iris:** I don’t like these tomatoes.
> **Me:** But they won a Chef Test.
> **Iris:** Well, not with me!
(The winning canned tomatoes, as tested by Jordi Viladas of Cafe Lago, were Del Monte Organic, which you should totally buy regardless of what Iris says.)
So we conducted the first-ever Iris Test, and Iris selected chocolate for the debut. I wanted to include a mix of bittersweet, semisweet, and milk chocolates, including some I hadn’t tried before, so here’s what I came up with, in the order we tasted:
1. Valrhona Le Noir 56% ($3/100g at Trader Joe’s)
3. Hersheys Milk Chocolate, (/1.55 oz at QFC)
2. Valrhona Guanaja ($4.49/75g @ Delaurenti)
4. Hersheys Special Dark, (33 cents/1.45 oz at QFC)
1. Valrhona Jivara Lait ($4.49/75g at Delaurenti)
Trader Joe’s was out of my two favorites of theirs, Valrhona Le Noir Amer and Chocovic Ocumare. But whatever.
Want to know whose chocolate reigns supreme? Listen to the podcast:
[Iris Test #1: Chocolate](https://www.rootsandgrubs.com/podcasts/IrisTest1-Chocolate.m4a) (2.3MB AAC)
Iris and I went for a ride on the monorail this afternoon and stopped for fries at the McDonald’s at Westlake Center. While we were in line, Iris looked up at the big M, turned to me, and asked:
“Dada, how do you know this place has fries?”
“I’ve got a good idea in my head!” said Iris during breakfast.
“Okay…”
“You could do a science experiment.”
“Like what?”
“You could put some apple cider in water and see what happens.”
I got a bowl of water and poured in a few drops of apple cider. Not much happened. “It’s not fizzy,” Iris noted.
“I can make it fizzy,” I said. I added some vinegar and baking soda. That did the trick.
“You should do one more experiment while I finish my cereal,” said Iris. “How about baking soda and hot sauce?” I put a teaspoon of baking soda in another bowl and plopped in a few drops of Frank’s RedHot. It turned into a disgusting, fizzy mass. Iris leaned over and smelled it. “Aggggh!” she said, recoiling.
I sniffed. The capsaicin had volatilized and was going straight up my nose. “You’re right, agggh,” I said.
“We are real scientists,” said Iris.